Imposter Syndrome
Wednesday, April 1, 2026
I heard a great keynote address at the Go Getter Girls' Unstoppable Summit. It was delivered by Leslie Alvarez and was called "Imposter Syndrome? Or Human Nature?"
The term Imposter Syndrome was first created by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes. It is the inability to believe your success is deserved due to hard work, skills, and capabilities. It's all luck.
Clance and Imes state that people who exhibit Imposter Syndrome are usually high achievers but are unable to internalize and accept their success. They often attribute their accomplishments to luck and fear that others will eventually unmask them as frauds.
If you have Imposter Syndrome, you exhibit two of the following:
1. Need to be special or the best
2. Characteristics of "superman"/"superwoman"
3. Fear of failure
4. Denial of ability
5. Discount praise
6. Feel guilty about success
While listening to the lecture, my thoughts turned to children, as usual. Parents have a huge impact on the formation of Imposter Syndrome in children. I'd like to focus on two behaviors that are polar opposites that parents can exhibit that foster Imposter Syndrome:
1. Always Criticizing: When children hear constant criticism for whatever they attempt that is not "perfect" in the eyes of their parent, they learn that nothing they do matters.
2. Praise Without Specifics: When parents say superlative statements to their children without giving a specific reason, they send a message that they expect perfection and their children will feel anxiety and pressure to constantly reach those expectations.
What are parents to do! Like everything else when dealing with children, nothing is black and white. It's always gray. Moderation is always the key. One example is: When your child comes home after playing a basketball game you couldn't attend, instead of asking, "Did you win?" Ask: "Did you have fun?" I assure you that you will find out the results anyway and you are not focusing on their individual performance, rather you are focusing on did they have a good time. You are eliminating your child having to deal with any of the attributes associated with a person with Imposter Syndrome.
